9.22.2009

99. et puis je fume


Me peering over the penthouse window

Something I noticed just now: I seem to get attached to people really easily but at the same time, I can cut those people out of my life really easily too. It's weird because with some people I meet, after talking with them a few times I think to myself "I'm really going to miss them if we ever lose touch" It's like I have some sort of desire to be friends with them for the rest of my life & most of the time I'm not sure why. I guess I have a hard time cutting people out..I mean it's kind of weird when you've known each other for awhile then go your separate ways..knowing you probably won't see/hear from each other ever again. I've experienced this a lot over the past few months with people I met on vacation, at the bar, and just anywhere. I did get "attached" to a lot of people but now I've lost touch with so many of them (or I'm trying to hahah) and right now I'm just sitting here wondering WHY I was so attached in the first place.

& I'm also thinking about how (as I'm getting older) it's getting harder and harder to keep people around for a long time. Actually I shouldn't even call them friends - just "close acquaintances" I guess. People are constantly coming and going - I used to think of this as a sad fact of life but now I don't. When someone leaves, a new replacement will always come in to make you forget about the previous person. For most people, the only ones who will ALWAYS be with you all through life is yourself, your family and a few true friends (in that order). As long as you have them, nobody/nothing else in life really matters. At least I know that's true for me. & I'm really grateful to have good relationships with all of them.

I think I've been writing this post for about an hour now. I don't even know why I decided to write it just now. Nothing in particular happened today that made me decide to think about this. Actually there was something I DID want to write about but I totally went off topic. I'll probably make another post about that some other time.
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5 comments

  1. When I was young I though that I would keep in touch forever with my friends. When getting older I discovered that even closest friend leave... I also discover that when things goes hard, nobody's here for you -including your familly- except yourself. And trust me,it happens to everybody who encounter some difficulties. Even if we were a very close familly, only ONE person had been there during hard times.

    That's remind me a conversation I had last year with an old coworker. I was telling him that I didn't want any child and he told me "You should, that's a wonderful thing. Plus, it's important because when you get older, people around you start to die, old friends are no longer there, so if you don't have children you will be really alone..."

    Eventually I think that the true key is to be in peace with ourself. And I will finish here because I don't want to write a comment longer than your entry ;P

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  2. I think it's very hard to stay friends with someone for all your lifetime..though I won't say its impossible. I guess it is true that you ultimately just have yourself but I think personally for me my family will always be here for me too, to give their support if I ever need it

    people say that but it's not necessarily true. Well, I still wouldn't want to have children lol. I think no matter where you are in life, as long as you're happy with yourself that's all that matters. You'll be able to start a new life wherever you go.
    I'm sure we're not going to die as hermits without having any interaction with people lol.

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  3. your shoes GLISTEN! where did you get them?

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  4. lol it's just the light..it's supposed to be shiny snakeskin

    I got them from a sample sale awhile ago

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  5. This is so true, even the friends from high school who I spent the summer with, I find I cannot relate to anymore. Alexandre's is a sad thought, I would hate for the people I love the very most not to be there. But I guess everything is eventual and maybe we change so much as we get older that we just have to lose connections. Haha and I've thought of that too, I really don't think I'd want a child, but there is a lot of liability in old age lol. But Tiffany's right, there will always be someone by your side, you just have to look.

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